You read the papers and on the second page, the Deputy Prime Minister is saying that Malays are not lazy and that the community would do well to instill strong Islamic values in their children and you’re thinking,
oh, tell me something important instead of your usual racial politicking or shut the fuck up, save your energy for getting someone to clean up the bits of skeleton in your closet or here’s a thought, go run the damn country. You read the papers and you feel like you sympathize with the plight of the flood victims in Johor. Then you go out and a car with a Johor license plate is being an ass on KL streets and you find yourself nastily thinking,
Go back and drown in your flood, asshole! You immediately regret having the thought at all; you’re a rotten person and you should do more to help those less fortunate than yourself. Instead, you go home and read the papers and they’re reporting that the US’ National Intelligence Estimate have concluded the situation in Iraq is only going to get worse and you’re thinking
well, doh, one doesn’t need much intelligence to figure that one out. The papers are reporting that the US government have come up with a clever, brand new strategy for Iraq and that is to….wait for it……send in more troops and you’re thinking,
wasn’t that your old strategy? And they’re reporting that Iraqis are fighting themselves but they’re not the only ones who have resorted to in-fighting. The Palestinians, taking a rest from fighting Israel perhaps, have resorted to a spot of in-fighting too - Fatah vs. Hamas and you’re thinking alright then, it sounds like a new development but it’s not really since someone, somewhere is always fighting in the land so dearly mentioned by the Torah, the Bible, the Quran. You read the papers about the very important issue of global warming and they’re telling you
It’s Real! It’s Real! and it’s man-made and again, you’re thinking
well, doh, what’s new? And then you read the papers and learn about Chewbacca gone amok on the streets of Los Angeles and you’re ……wait, Wookie Gone Wild???! Here’s an excerpt from the Los Angeles Times report (Feb 3rd 2007):
The buzz on Hollywood Boulevard on Friday was over the Chewbacca who police say crossed over to the dark side in front of hundreds of tourists at Grauman's Chinese Theatre.
LAPD officers arrested "Star Wars" street performer Frederick Evan Young, 44, of Los Angeles in his furry brown wookiee costume Thursday on a charge of misdemeanor battery for allegedly head-butting a tour guide who complained about Young's treatment of two visitors from Japan.
Authorities said it began when a Star Line Tours guide allegedly observed the Chewbacca character harassing two young girls from a rival Japanese tour company.
Guide Brian Sapir said that when he asked the performer not to touch the visitors, Young became angry.
"You could see in his eyes he was exploding beneath the mask," Sapir said Friday. "He yelled at me, 'Nobody tells this wookiee what to do!' "
See, I always knew these Star Wars freaks pose a danger to society. Bad Chewy, bad, bad, Chewy, what would LucasFilms say? “We are disappointed that someone dressed as Chewbacca would behave in this way.”
Previous Entry: Cooking With Three Generations
